It's quite normal for you to have an intense desire to get back together with your wife or ex-girlfriend after she broke up with you. She was your best friend and the person that you cared about the most in this world. The rejection from having someone that close to you can be overwhelming and difficult to deal with emotionally. It has taken a toll on your male ego, your self-confidence and you are left with a giant hole in your life. Wanting to get her back in your life again as soon as possible is probably on your mind throughout most of your day. You should realize though that your attitude and how you deal with your ex is more important than any plan that you might hatch to get her back.
Most guys try all the tried and true methods that they are told will help them to convince their girlfriend to come back. You have probably already thought of trying to talk things through or promising that things will be different in order to change her heart. Of course, in case you didn't already know, these methods aren't going to get you anywhere. Unless your wife or girlfriend has a desire to work things out, these methods will only make her avoid your further. If you are guilty of trying to talk to her about getting back together or if you made some emotional plea for her to come back to you because you love her then you have done more damage than good. The only way that you are going to undo this damage is by giving her a little space and time. You should avoid trying to make contact with her and wait for her to connect with you again. It will happen but it's going to take a while. You can contact her again at some point if you want to but only once you have your life straightened out and you are feeling strong emotionally again.
First, the attitude that you need to adopt when it comes to your girlfriend or wife or any woman, for that matter, is one of indifference. In short, you need to be willing to walk away both figuratively and literally when she begins to treat you poorly. If she yells at you, has an attitude with you or if she acts disrespectful towards you in any way, you need to be willing to walk away. This attitude will permeate your soul and be evident to your ex in your body language as well as your actions.
Along with this new attitude you need to put any thought out of your mind that concerns how she will react to your new attitude. It's going to be a little shocking for her, that's for sure. If she is accustomed to yelling at you or calling you names, she is accustomed to holding all the power in the relationship. If, in the past, you stood there and took this abuse or if you tried to argue with her or explain yourself, those days are through. From now on, you will remind her that she is not your partner, girlfriend or wife. She relinquished that title and the right to state her opinion about anything when she left you. You will turn and literally walk away from the conversation and take that power with you. She will do one of two things. She will either come after you immediately and apologize or she will think about what just happened for a while. She will then have gained some respect for you as a man and the process of falling in love with you will begin.
Next, never let your girlfriend or wife see you upset, sad or depressed. You always want your ex to see you at your best. This means that your physical appearance is tidy and clean. You have a smile on your face and your body posture and body language says that you are happy. You have a renewed zest for life. You have goals and dreams as well as the ability to achieve anything that you set your mind to. While the breakup was devastating to you, your life is actually better now that you no longer worry about what she thinks of you. You're free to do what you want with your life.
The temptation might be there still to want your ex to think that you're sad about your breakup. You might think that she will expect you to be sitting at home alone in the dark missing her and wanting her to come back to you. Look, you will gain nothing by portraying this side of you to your girlfriend. She will only lose respect for you and view you as sad and pathetic. Pain does not equal love. If she wonders if you miss her then she should ask you. This is your life we're talking about and every day that you spend being upset and lonely is a wasted day. Don't ever let her see you cry or upset about the breakup and never tell her that you love her. You can tell her that you love her about a minute or two after she confesses that she still loves you. Make her sweat a little bit.
Along with all of this, you need to back up your claims to being so happy and loving life with something real. What are you doing? What is your life all about? It's time that you solidified your goals and dreams and wrote them down. You have wasted enough time being sad. It's time for you to be happy. What makes you happy? What do you want to achieve in your life? Do you want to travel the world? Have you always dreamed about being wealthy? How are you going to get there? What do you dream about when you're feeling good and you feel that you can achieve anything? Write it down and start making plans for how you're going to achieve these goals. Whether your girlfriend or wife is a part of that dream is up to you.
You will find that in relationships with women and in life, in general, your attitude has everything to do with your success. Women have an instinct for picking up how strong or weak a man is and they are always attracted to men that are confident and who have vision. People in general are attracted to others that are happy. This is just how we are wired. Once your ex realizes that she made a huge mistake about you and your relationship, she will want come back to you. Once she feels attracted to you again there will be no holding her back. Any obstacle that was in her way before will be gone. There will be no need to talk about the breakup and you won't have to change a thing about yourself. She will want to get back together and you will be the one to decide whether you want to continue the relationship or not.
Most guys try all the tried and true methods that they are told will help them to convince their girlfriend to come back. You have probably already thought of trying to talk things through or promising that things will be different in order to change her heart. Of course, in case you didn't already know, these methods aren't going to get you anywhere. Unless your wife or girlfriend has a desire to work things out, these methods will only make her avoid your further. If you are guilty of trying to talk to her about getting back together or if you made some emotional plea for her to come back to you because you love her then you have done more damage than good. The only way that you are going to undo this damage is by giving her a little space and time. You should avoid trying to make contact with her and wait for her to connect with you again. It will happen but it's going to take a while. You can contact her again at some point if you want to but only once you have your life straightened out and you are feeling strong emotionally again.
First, the attitude that you need to adopt when it comes to your girlfriend or wife or any woman, for that matter, is one of indifference. In short, you need to be willing to walk away both figuratively and literally when she begins to treat you poorly. If she yells at you, has an attitude with you or if she acts disrespectful towards you in any way, you need to be willing to walk away. This attitude will permeate your soul and be evident to your ex in your body language as well as your actions.
Along with this new attitude you need to put any thought out of your mind that concerns how she will react to your new attitude. It's going to be a little shocking for her, that's for sure. If she is accustomed to yelling at you or calling you names, she is accustomed to holding all the power in the relationship. If, in the past, you stood there and took this abuse or if you tried to argue with her or explain yourself, those days are through. From now on, you will remind her that she is not your partner, girlfriend or wife. She relinquished that title and the right to state her opinion about anything when she left you. You will turn and literally walk away from the conversation and take that power with you. She will do one of two things. She will either come after you immediately and apologize or she will think about what just happened for a while. She will then have gained some respect for you as a man and the process of falling in love with you will begin.
Next, never let your girlfriend or wife see you upset, sad or depressed. You always want your ex to see you at your best. This means that your physical appearance is tidy and clean. You have a smile on your face and your body posture and body language says that you are happy. You have a renewed zest for life. You have goals and dreams as well as the ability to achieve anything that you set your mind to. While the breakup was devastating to you, your life is actually better now that you no longer worry about what she thinks of you. You're free to do what you want with your life.
The temptation might be there still to want your ex to think that you're sad about your breakup. You might think that she will expect you to be sitting at home alone in the dark missing her and wanting her to come back to you. Look, you will gain nothing by portraying this side of you to your girlfriend. She will only lose respect for you and view you as sad and pathetic. Pain does not equal love. If she wonders if you miss her then she should ask you. This is your life we're talking about and every day that you spend being upset and lonely is a wasted day. Don't ever let her see you cry or upset about the breakup and never tell her that you love her. You can tell her that you love her about a minute or two after she confesses that she still loves you. Make her sweat a little bit.
Along with all of this, you need to back up your claims to being so happy and loving life with something real. What are you doing? What is your life all about? It's time that you solidified your goals and dreams and wrote them down. You have wasted enough time being sad. It's time for you to be happy. What makes you happy? What do you want to achieve in your life? Do you want to travel the world? Have you always dreamed about being wealthy? How are you going to get there? What do you dream about when you're feeling good and you feel that you can achieve anything? Write it down and start making plans for how you're going to achieve these goals. Whether your girlfriend or wife is a part of that dream is up to you.
You will find that in relationships with women and in life, in general, your attitude has everything to do with your success. Women have an instinct for picking up how strong or weak a man is and they are always attracted to men that are confident and who have vision. People in general are attracted to others that are happy. This is just how we are wired. Once your ex realizes that she made a huge mistake about you and your relationship, she will want come back to you. Once she feels attracted to you again there will be no holding her back. Any obstacle that was in her way before will be gone. There will be no need to talk about the breakup and you won't have to change a thing about yourself. She will want to get back together and you will be the one to decide whether you want to continue the relationship or not.
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